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So how do they keep a marriage going strong after all those years? They joke that the reason their mutual misunderstanding works is because they live for a higher ideal, a shared sacred purpose that's bigger than their marriage…PASTA. “And we have pasta at least three times a week. Even when I have a headache,” quips wife Renee Taylor. But husband Joe Bologna confides that to make a marriage work in Hollywood, or anywhere for that matter, the number one priority for both has to be making a commitment. “Well… I think it starts with commitment,” says Bologna. “The marriage has to be important enough to you to keep it together. It's hard…” admits Bologna of keeping a marriage together while working in show business. “If I had a marriage where I was off making a movie in Paris and she was off making a movie in Tokyo I don't know how we'd have a relationship.” But he admits that he really can't separate the “working together and the loving and the being together. It's so much a part of our relationship, because we write about ourselves… we write about our relationship.”
When they met, some 35 years ago, Joe was working as a director of television commercials and Renee was working as an actress. Their manager introduced them because he felt they would have a common rapport together. When Renee first shook Joe's hand and looked into his eyes she says she thought to herself, “this is the man that I am going to marry.” There was something about his eyes that made her know that he was the one from the first moment they met. “I had a feeling I knew him before,” confides Renee.
“Well, I think I knew right away too,” admits husband Joe. “But I was frightened …because… I knew but I didn't want to know. You know what I mean?…” continues husband Joe Bologna. “I would always choose women who loved me a little more then I loved them. That was my own way of maintaining my own invulnerability. And… I knew when I met Renee that the game was over. And that scared me.” admits Joe. “But, no… I knew, I knew as soon as I saw her. She looked like somebody I knew… like we knew each other a long time.”
Thus began the successful show business and real life pairing of Renee Taylor and Joe Bologna which has given birth to one son, actor/writer Gabriel Bologna and a host of projects written by the couple for Broadway, the movies and television. Segments of several of their past works are included in If You Ever Leave Me… I'm Going With You, including… Lovers and Other Strangers, Made For Each Other, It Had To Be You and Bermuda Avenue Triangle.
They've appeared in dozens of films, Broadway plays and TV specials together and separately over the years. Joe's screen roles include My Favorite Year, Chapter Two, Blame It On Rio and Big Daddy. Renee, most remembered as the mother on CBS's The Nanny, has many film credits as well, including… The Last of the Red Hot Lovers, A New Leaf, and The Detective.
When Joe and Renee are working on their own projects that's when Joe says he gets that nirvana feeling. “That doesn't mean that our projects are better than other peoples projects. It means that we have that total visceral release… like relaxing the whole muscle, there's no tension left.”
“We spend a lot of time together writing and having a wonderful time,” says Bologna of their three decade relationship. When it comes to finding your soul mate, says Renee, “you just have to follow your heart…follow your dream.” …And… of course, follow your dream man out the door if he ever tries to leave you.
For tickets to this summer's Broadway production of If You Ever Leave Me… I'm Going With You call Ticketmaster at 212-307-4100. Visit www.reneetaylor.com for more info or to purchase Taylor & Bologna's Two Way Pasta Sauce and other interesting items.
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When they first started writing together they decided to follow the old adage write what you know. So what did they know? They knew about their relationship, and the many humorous relatives that made up their life together as a family. From this came the fodder for their plays, movies and television projects which have kept audiences in stitches for the past three decades. Starting with their successful writing collaboration, Lovers and Other Strangers, for which the movie screenplay received an Academy Award nomination…on down through to their latest writing/acting endeavor, If You Ever Leave Me… I'm Going With You, which will be going to Broadway in July.
They were engaged about 3 months later and married within a year. The original plan was for a reception at Tavern on the Green but the prices at Tavern on the Green were incredibly high. So Merv Griffin, whose TV show Renee worked on in those days, offered to give her a wedding reception on the stage of a little theater in New York. He would pay for everything as long as Renee would let him film it and broadcast excerpts on his TV show. Although Renee loved the idea Joe thought it was a terrible plan and wanted a normal wedding reception like any normal couple. “Of course,” Joe says, “we had the wedding reception on the Merv Griffin Show.” Which he admits was probably for the best because, unlike today, thirty five years ago an Italian marrying a Jew was a big deal. A normal wedding probably would have meant only half from both their families showing up …BUT… a wedding aired on national TV meant everyone came and everyone got along.
With all they've done over the years Renee is quick to admit that their current play, If You Ever Leave Me… I'm Going With You, is the project she likes most of all. Husband, Joe Bologna, says it's hard to pick just one all time favorite. “It's like if you have a tense muscle and you relax that muscle completely. You can't quantify that feeling… it doesn't work that way… it's an endless feeling.” If you have that creative feeling it's much the same continues Joe, “whether it's writing, directing, acting or a combination of the three… it's GREAT. If you don't quite have that feeling… It's nice, but, it's not that nirvana feeling.”
